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a frog the size of texas

all cat stories all the time

6/16/16 12:14 pm

I'm kinda sorry we didn't get to experience the Witcher 3 glitch where a noble lady dressed in red follows Geralt everywhere, cheering him on, before they patched it.
The thing that makes this so funny is, the woman would perpetually clap her hands and yell “long live the champion,” making it seem like Geralt accrued an overzealous stalker. And no matter how much Geralt ran away, the lady would always dash after him, reminding him of how awesome he was.


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6/15/16 09:01 am

And what's this bird?

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6/14/16 04:15 pm - An educated man

Last installment, Murderface was mostly dealing with vermin problems at home and losing yet another traveling companion. This time, he goes to the library!

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6/14/16 11:18 am

Cracked reviews Warcraft.
At the very least, I was hoping to see a scene where the heroes realize they have absent-mindedly trapped their army behind a wall of farmhouses, forcing themselves to have to blow up one of their own buildings and waste precious resources just to escape. I would've been happy with any kind of strategizing at all, even a single scene where a blacksmith agonizes over whether to upgrade the ground units' attack or hit points would've satisfied me. But it never comes up. Not once. That's right: This is a Warcraft movie with absolutely no math.


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6/13/16 02:40 pm - Murderface Goes to the Movies

Toby and I went to Warcraft on Friday night, optimistically assuming that while it was probably going to be a terrible movie, the opening-night crowd might be a bit rowdier and thus make at least the experience of viewing it entertaining. Alas, our audience was sober and well-behaved and not a single person screamed “FOR THE HORRRRRRRDE!!” at any point. I was disappoint, because this meant we had only the movie to distract us. Maybe if we’d gone to the 10pm showing, after people had the opportunity to drink before and during it (this was at one of the dinner theatres).

So I asked Murderface what he thought about it.

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6/9/16 12:20 pm - Alas, poor Rayya

Last episode, Murderface had built his first house out in the country, installed Valdimar, his first housecarl, shoveled money into his pockets and told him to furnish the place, then took his second housecarl, Rayya, out adventuring. Let’s see what happens this time, shall we?

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6/8/16 07:22 pm - I can do this too!

Things I have said while playing Skyrim:

Watch this! Oh. That's not a necromancer. That's a rock.




Sent from my Apple ][e

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6/8/16 09:35 am - WWJC?

You know what this place needs? A Jesus' pet dinosaur nacho platter.

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6/6/16 04:14 pm - Yes, my Thane. Of course, my Thane. Anything you wish, my Thane

Last episode we had all sorts of excitement as our murder hobo non-hero got mixed up yet again with Daedric Princes. This episode: miscellaneous quests day!

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6/6/16 01:33 pm

This Tumblr post involving Greek gods and why "please Hades at all costs" is the right answer.

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